Funniest Birthplan Ever

Julie, of A Little Pregnant, had her first son when I had mine, about 3.5 years ago after much hot action on the infertility front. She had multiple miscarriages and other challenges which she shared with humor and honesty in her blog. Her son came prematurely and breastfeeding did not go as she hoped, and again, she shared everything with the Internets.

I thank her for doing this because it was her blog that let me know that I was not alone in my struggles to conceive. It was her blog that answered the question for me of “who wants to read someone else’s journal?” Every step of the way in motherhood, this has become more obvious to me as we can all accompany each other and share in the (not as natural as you thought it would be) transition to motherhood. Yay for mom bloggers. You keep me sane.

And now, Julie is expecting her second boy. She’s fully aware that you can plan plan plan, but in parenting, you cannot control control control. Read her “birth plan” to get a taste of her brand of wit.

Here’s a little taste of her detailed fantasy labor description to get you started:

Oh, sure, some women might think it hurts to have your entire body seize up in the grip of a spasmodic contraction. But I experience it more as, oh, kind of like a sneeze. That’s it, a delicate kitten’s sneeze. The pre-pregnancy kind, with no appalling stress incontinence to speak of.

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Whitney

RookieMoms.com co-founder Whitney lives with her husband, son, and daughter in the San Francisco Bay Area where she writes about parenting, crafts, and activities that moms can do with babies in tow. She and Heather also publish 510Families.com, a site for East Bay parents.